There’s something strange about being an independent artist online. One day, you feel unstoppable. The next, you wonder if any of this is even worth it.
I’ve always been naturally self-motivated. I think part of it is just how I’m wired. Even when things get difficult, I usually find a way to keep moving forward. But that doesn’t mean I’m immune to doubt. Like everyone else, I have days where I question everything. Days where I wonder if I should stop sharing my music publicly and go back to simply making music for myself.
What’s difficult to a lot of people nowadays is how easy it is to get trapped in the numbers game: streams, followers, reach, engagement, algorithms and the constant pressure to release content. There is an endless sea of talented artists online, many of whom seem far more skilled than I am.
After spending a few years publicly sharing my music as Spacey Panda, I started noticing something important: perspective changes everything.
Some tracks I released barely received attention at first, only to suddenly connect with people weeks or even months later. Other tracks performed well on one streaming platform while completely falling flat on another. I’ve seen the exact same social media post resonate deeply on one app and disappear into silence on another.
Even musically, things rarely make sense in the way we expect them to.
Some of the tracks I worked the hardest on technically, the ones where I obsessed over every detail, never really found an audience. Meanwhile, other tracks I created experimentally, imperfect and spontaneous, somehow connected with people in a much bigger way.
That realization taught me something important: we often have far less control over outcomes than we think.
As artists grow, expectations quietly grow with them too. I remember being genuinely excited when one of my tracks reached ten streams. Back then, that felt huge to me. Ten real people choosing to listen to something I created out of the billions of songs available online.
Now, if a track doesn’t reach a few thousand streams, I sometimes catch myself feeling disappointed.
I think that shift says more about perspective than reality.
Because if you truly stop and visualize those numbers as actual human beings standing in front of you, it becomes impressive again. Every stream, every comment, every like represents someone who paused their day for a moment and decided to connect with your work. That matters more than we sometimes allow ourselves to believe.
Gratitude becomes essential in this process, I mean real gratitude that you feel in your gut, the kind that reminds you not to take anything for granted.
I also quickly realised that quality connection matters far more to me than quantity. We’ve all seen artists explode overnight with a viral hit, only to disappear just as quickly. This kind of success itself also comes with pressure. Once people “make it,” the expectation to continuously produce bigger and bigger hits can become overwhelming. I’m not even sure I would be prepared for that scenario…
That’s why comparison can be dangerous if handled incorrectly. Comparison should inspire you, not destroy your sense of worth.
I think it’s healthy to admire other artists. It’s healthy to learn from them and be motivated by what they create. But the moment comparison starts convincing you that your own voice has less value, it stops being useful.
Sometimes the healthiest thing you can do creatively is step away for a moment and take time off and reconnect with yourself outside the algorithm.
Because eventually, we all need to ask ourselves the same question:
Why am I doing this in the first place?
It’s surprisingly easy to lose sight of that when numbers start defining your mood. Of course we seek connection through our art, that’s human. But it’s important to reflect on what kind of connection we actually want, and with whom.
In the process, for me, community has become one of the biggest sources of motivation.
I genuinely believe in celebrating victories, both mine and other people’s. I don’t care anymore if it occasionally looks like bragging, because to me, those moments matter. Celebrating progress reinforces motivation, and supporting other artists creates the kind of environment many of us wish existed more online.
We’re all navigating uncertainty together, trying to create meaningful things while balancing life, doubt, creativity, and visibility in an extremely noisy world. Finding like-minded people who understand that journey can make an enormous difference.
At the end of the day, I think perspective shapes almost everything, in every aspect of life.
Sometimes success is not about becoming the biggest artist in the room. Sometimes it’s simply about continuing to create while staying connected to the reasons you started in the first place.
In my world, that alone is already something worth being proud of.
- Want to be part of my community? Follow me on Instagram, where I am the most active.
- You enjoyed this topic? Then you might also enjoy the perspective Prof Odfellod shared in a similar article here.
— Spacey Panda 💜
About the Author
